Kamis, 11 Maret 2010

When you can’t say no.

You know sometimes it’s hard for us, especially Indonesian people to say… “NO”, especially when we asked to do something by our boss or our parents.

But I have different things..

I always say NO to my bos who always chased me to teach English, while I’m already sink my self into Indonesian teaching.

I always say NO to whatever my dad says to me, because he starts to be weird person for me, he always being egoism, always wants me to do everything that benefits him.. hello.. ..?! That is parents’ tasks to make the kid happy, have a stable life, and respect the parents – not the opposite way. How could I make you happy if you always suffer me, Dad?

But then, we all know that God always wants the best for us, no matter which ways you choose, believe me, God always lead you to the best way – for YOU.

God never be egoism, God already knew everything before you even think about it. God holds your dream and makes it come true. Then, let me tell you, if God said “YES” you can’t bargain or kneel your knee and ask God to make it “NO”.

Believe me, you can’t say NO if God wants it to become true. Like two days ago, in the morning, when I see two lines instead of one. I knew God, I can’t say no this time.

Thanks for everything; You know I love You more than this.

Jumat, 29 Januari 2010

Without Wings

Before I have this blog, my mysterious reader often asked me. Why "Angel on Earth" ? 
Usually I only answered, because I will never have wings to fly to heaven. They won't let me in. 

Then my reader said, "but you have dreams. that is your wings!" 
I agree. 

However, since I back from Australia, I don't have any dream to reach. I feel empty, I feel everbody looked at me as a different person. An unmotivated person, (that wasn't me..), a person who always said something negative, (that wasn't me), even now, I became a pessimistic person, this isn't me. 

Without a dream, a person can't go anywhere, and surely will go wrong easily. 
I have to make dreams, but I really don't know what I want to do right now. 

I just want to stay in my place not moving forward nor to the back, 
God please help me, 

I'm breathless- cold - and without wings.

In my office on Saturday. 
Feeling empty.